We're going...

...TO DISNEY!!

After almost losing my job and then thankfully NOT losing my job we decided to spend a little bit of our savings and head out to greener (Mickey) pastures for a few days in October. Thankfully the trip can be canceled if anything happens between now and then...but I'm trying to think "glass half full" about it.

Bubba is ready to go see Mickey for his first trip to Disney World!

YAY!

10 years is a long time

Well, it is here...the 10 year anniversary of my mom's passing. I'm shocked and in disbelief that it has been that long. Where has the time gone??

I also find it unbelievable the things my mom has missed these last 10 years. I say "missed" as she wasn't physically present...but I know she has been with me on all my journey's since her passing. She has missed me getting married, graduating college, giving birth to three beautiful children...geesh. So many milestones I've had to get through without her.

I want to share this story with you because this is why I believe in angels.

August 16th, 2005...
My husband and I are at the hospital. Today I am having my second baby!! We don't know if it is a boy or a girl, but we are so excited. I chose to go to a different hospital than where I had Jo-Jo. I didn't feel I was treated well at the first hospital. This hospital has a wonderful reputation and is actually dubbed "The Baby Hospital".

We are waiting in my "recovery" room for things to get moving. My labor and delivery nurse is here, busy and bustling around. The baby's strong heartbeat is in the background, steadily thumping away. A million people stop by to introduce themselves. Do they really expect me to remember their names and/or faces?? I'm a nervous wreck!

Finally my nurse tells me it is time for me to walk to the operating room. She tells my husband he can stay in the room and put the operating room gown on...they will come for him as soon as I'm on the table and they are ready to start the surgery.

WHAT??

This wasn't in the birth plan!! He is supposed to walk with me to the OR. My heart starts beating a little faster. He smiles at me and his eyes tell me everything is going to be okay. I take a deep breath and my nurse and I start the walk to the OR.

The first thing I notice in the OR is how cold it is! I'm shivering after only being in the room a few moments. The second thing I notice is all the people! Everyone is wearing a baby blue colored scrub and most are wearing masks. There is a tiny metal table in the center of the room with a huge light over it. I am lead to that table and told to sit on the edge. I am so cold.

Soon the Anesthesiologist arrives. He tells me he is going to place my epidural and spinal. My heart beats a little faster. He begins. My back is so cold. I feel the buring sensation of the numbing solution being poked into my back and I start to cry. I'm so cold, I'm so scared, I'm so tired...and I'm so alone. A room full of people and my husband isn't here.

Suddenly a wad of tissues is pressed into my hand and a hand reaches out to wipe my nose. I cry a little harder at the generosity of this person. Seeing me cry harder she wraps her arms around me and strokes my head. She says nothing and neither do I. She holds me while the doctor finishes placing the needle in my back.

And here is the kicker...........she smells just like my mom.

I'm not kidding. I'm not making this up.

I look into her eyes. I can't see the rest of her face as she is wearing the surgical mask already. I see the kindest pair of chocolate brown eyes. She wipes my eyes with a tissue. No words are spoken.

Finally my husband is let in. The surgery begins. Things are going very well. Then the baby doesn't want to come out. Doctors are laying across my chest trying to push the baby out, but the baby won't come out. I feel sick, like I'm going to throw up. The doctor says she is going to use forceps to get the baby out.

Finally the baby is out. It's a girl they say. She is whisked away before I can see her. I can't hear her cry. I ask my husband what is wrong and he says he doesn't know. Strangely I don't get scared. I see the chocolate brown eyes again framed by thick black lashes. She doesn't look scared. I'm not scared. After a few moments I hear my daughters first cries. I know it is going to be okay. I'm done crying. I have a daughter.

I never see that nurse's full face. I never learn her name. I know she was there because my mom couldn't be. She comforted me in ways no one but my mom could have. When she held me, I felt safe. Her smell, the comforting way she held me...my mom was in the OR with me.
________

On this 10 year anniversary I miss my mom just as much as the day she died. I lost a small piece of my heart that day and it will never be replaced.

I love you mom.

I don't like fire

This is why ignorance is bliss...

Click HERE to see what my husband was up to yesterday. He isn't in any of the pictures (or sound) that I know of.

Good Grief.

It's my party & I'll cry if I want to!!

Well...it's here. My Birthday. Yuck. Another year gone. Why does getting older have to stink?

I have to admit to those of you reading that I'm in a bit of a funk. It's this time of year...and not related to my birthday. I will blog about it soon. Right now I'd rather just sit back and let the day pass by...uneventfully.

No need for birthday wishes as I've decided this year just to let it pass...no fuss, no muss.

So here's to "just another day".

Taking a deep breath

Well, it appears I made it through the first round of "layoffs" at my job...meaning that as of right now I am still employed. Sadly though a lot of my friends were let go, and that breaks my heart. Hopefully once the economy picks up or our floor gets busier they will call them back.

In the meantime I am just taking a deep breath and knocking on all the wood I see. Thanks to all those who wished me well and listened to my constant job griping. You guys have been my rocks!

Getting the buzz on...er...I mean OUT

So I've posted about many Etsy sellers in the past, but I was thinking today I should "repost" and get their names out there again. I know my blog isn't a heavily traveled site, but if I can help just one of these women get an extra sale...then it is worth it.

So here it goes...I hope I don't miss anyone. I'm trying to go off my Etsy site for help. These will be in no particular order either...just as I find them.

Do you need a fancy hairpiece for an upcoming party or wedding -- or just some cutsie hair bling for your little girl?? Check out PinkTigersDen - http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5913445. She made the cutest hair clippies for my daughter pictured here:

Looking for an inspired wedding, birthday or just "Hey, I'm thinking of you" gift? Look no further than DeSignsByRene. She recently opened her own shop (though you can still find her on Etsy). Her web address is: http://designsbyrene.homestead.com/index.html
Here is an example of her work:


Another gorgeous wedding/birthday/anniversary/"whatever" gift comes from Java Jane. You can find her at http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5951266. She uses pictures of architectual designs to create custom pictures of any name you want! Here is a sample of her work:


In the market for some gorgeous handmade jewelry perfect for any function?? Head on over to Heidi's Jewelry Designs. http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5955483. She created the most beautiful nursing necklaces for me as seen here:

Looking for gorgeous custom paper products?? I've got not only one, but TWO wonderful and talented women who have worked very hard to help me make Bubba's up coming birthday truely special.

The first is T and Little S Designs. She has created a gorgeous banner AND personalized Thank You cards for me. She has talent and is great at dealing with me. You can find her shop at http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5324821. This is the banner she made for me:


The second is Platinum Designs. This woman has worked diligently with me and created a perfect banner for the party. She has tremendous talent and heart. Her shop is also filled with delightful custom invitations and other goodies. You can find her at http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6067518. She made this adorable creation for us:


I can't forget another of my favorite Etsy ladies...she replied to an Alchemy where I was looking for items to buy my niece for Christmas that pertained to her raising bunnies. Brenda of Memories and Treasures ROCKED my request and created two GORGEOUS necklace charms that my niece swooned over. You can find her shop at http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6412335.
I don't have a picture of the necklace charms she created for me, but I'm "borrowing" this one from her website to show you how talented she is...


Anyone who knows me knows I have a "strange" sense of humor and I like to send greeting cards to friends and family. I've purchased many many cards on etsy and don't have pictures of them all, but here's where you can find them:
Quirky Randomosity - http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5097271
Laura's Impressions - http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6499986
NotMoira - http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5766973
JadeAnn - http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6018949

This is just a sampling of what I've purchased on Etsy the past year. I laugh because when someone asks me about an idea my reply is often..."Take it to Etsy!!"

I hope I haven't forgotten anyone...